Rules of Tinder – Guy’s Edition

How many of you have downloaded Tinder? Almost every desperate soul who needs action on weekends didĀ it. I don’t blame you. I’m one of your kind. Even I need action every now and then. But, can ‘Tinder’ provide me with much-needed sexual relief?

The answer is, ‘YES’. All you need to do is don’t be an asshole that shit, be the ass hole she wants to eat. Here are some laid-down ‘Rules’ that one should follow in order to land a date or sex buddy. *wink-wink*

Rules for Dicks –

  • Your nipples aren’t tempting –

If you don’t possessĀ 6 pack abs like Brad Pitt from Troy, please don’t flaunt your belly button. Girls literally have no interest in seeing your beer belly. That’s a big turn off. Put the nicest of shirts and click and post it on Tinder. Don’t forget to smile.

  • Can I have your number?

“Hell No! Creep!’ It is similar to asking her about the color of her panties. That’s not a Gentleman behaviour. Give it some time and pop up the question. If she gave you her digits, ‘All the Best’ wetting her pussy with your Morgan Freeman tone, if not, she is just ‘Angel Priya’ of Tinder.

  • Group Photos? You sure?

Never post a picture with a group or with a girl. If you want to, make sure you’re hell of an eye candy. Keep in mind she will never ever go out with an ugly ‘fuddu’.

  • Wordplay before foreplay!

If she is not dumb, she will never date you. Girls dig men with high intellect. Impress her with your words, not with the size of your cock (that’s secondary).

  • Don’t throw unnecessary things!

She wants to shower with you not with your complements. Be contempt with your magnanimity. Neither she wants to know how much you earn. Never disclose things unless she asks you about it.


CONCLUSION – You know you are ugly if you’re reading this.